Would You Do This For Me?

I am continually mystified by the power of a song to lodge itself like a splinter in the heart.  A few chords in, and you can call up a hundred little memories of where you were when you heard it, and how you felt and who you were with and why it dropped anchor and stayed for years, decades, like the permanent houseboats in Seattle.  I have a whole interior coastline of eighties pop songs moored to my memory!

Would You Do This For Me, from Songs with Wings, seems to be one of those songs for people.  It's been some 7 years since I wrote it on the back of my grocery list during a trip to WalMart.  My soul-appointed sister, Emma, had just been diagnosed with cancer.  I wrote it for her.  She sang it many times with me at concerts.  For a long time, we thought it was her "former" song.  Then her cancer came back and she's living the reality of it again.  And her voice has been robbed by a tumor and constant illness, so she can't sing it anymore. 

But I always let her know when someone asks for it.  Like yesterday, when a lovely lady named Heather called my home asking for it so she could give it to the family of a little baby with cancer. Their 11th child. She heard me sing it at a funeral of a toddler, and the song harbored in her memory.  I told her about Emma.  She told me about her mother passing away.  My throat got tight for the weight of suffering.

We are all asked, at some point, the question of this song, asked by God Himself...

Would you do this for Me

Would you walk down this hard road

     It means laying down your dreams

And trusting in Me

Would you do this for Me

It means drinking a bitter cup

You might feel used up

When you do this for Me

Chorus:

But I promise you, you will not be alone

I’ll be carrying you as you carry this load

And I’ll draw you closer

Than you’ve ever been

And you’ll bring me glory

As you do this for Me

Would you do this for Me

It may cut like a knife

You will be tested by fire

And purified

But if you open your eyes

You’ll see the beauty

You’ll touch people’s lives

When you do this for Me

REPEAT CHORUS

Do you know what this means

It means you’re My witness

A witness to faith in the midst

Of your suffering and sacrifice

You’re giving My Word

A place to unfold

By telling the story that’s

Got to be told

Keep telling the story that’s

Got to be told

Soli deo gloria  

To God only be the glory…

                    

I will not be alone

He’ll be carrying me as I carry this load

And He’ll draw me closer

Than I’ve ever been

May I bring Him glory

As I do this for Him

May I bring Him glory

As I do this for Him

Spreading the Frosting (not a post about cake decorating)

At the intersection of homeschooling, music ministry, and family management, there are no stoplights.  It is more of a round-about, where I peel off in a different direction, depending on the day. 

Today I will sit by my daughter, reading Anatomy lessons and digging out a chicken bone to soak in vinegar.  I will check online to see how my son did on his chemistry test (God bless co-ops!)  I will rehearse the song I am singing tomorrow night at the Minnesota Teen Challenge Gala, where 150 drug offenders seeking treatment and transformation will march up on stage as I sing "Remind Me Who I Am" by Jason Gray (watch here).  I will hopefully stay on top of the laundry, since Wednesday is laundry day.  I will pray with my kids, chat with my husband, and hopefully get/give massages at the end of the day.

As my kids get older, inching toward adulthood and self-knowledge, I find myself praying more for them to find their passion and to excel for God's glory.  St. Irenaeus' quote, "The glory of God is man fully alive," is on my mind.  I keep reminding them that they can be a witness of God's love and power, no matter what they choose to do with their lives.  

I have to remind myself of that, too, when it seems like time I could be putting into music is spent in the car, taking the kids to activities.  It is not wasted time.  It is relationship time, all of us together, interacting.  It could be the seed of the next humorous song (thank you Tim Hawkins for modeling funny family songwriting regarding car farts! watch here)  But admittedly, I cringe when I realize that my music is in the lane of the round-about where the drivers are not sure what to do, so they keep circling and waiting to see the right signs.  

I thought I might have a CD close to done.  I have one song almost done.  

I thought I might have a busy concert schedule.  I have 3 gigs booked.  (Could this be because I put NO effort into promotion???)

I don't have a clear aim, but I love my life, and I don't think God is keeping tally of concerts and recordings.  I think He is pleased that I spent time this summer capturing my friend's beautiful testimony in song (listen here) as she lives with terminal cancer.  I think He is pleased when I leave the piano bench to go bump and set the volleyball with my girls.  And get them in some clean clothes.  

I try not to sow and water seeds of envy at other's musical successes and careers.  I have made my choices. I have spread the frosting out instead of globbing it in one spot.   It's enough sweetness for me.